Is Facebook distorting our priorities?

In the first hour of On Point this morning, Tom Ashbrook’s guests made some provocative comments about Facebook that echo my earlier thoughts.  With hundreds or thousands of friends, how do we maintain our close inner circle?  We all have circles — mine goes family, close friends, colleagues, past classmates, random acquaintances and people I’ve never met.  My priorities tend to stick in that order as well, although there are a few overlaps and jumpers from category to category.  But somehow I end up communicating more with people in the middle-netherworld than with the people I really care about – people I could call in a pinch.  Obviously I can still pick up the phone and call all my close friends and family, but the time I spend networking online does impact my ability to nurture more important connections.

I’m still a lover of connection and am happy to be in the generation of social media.  I just have to remind myself that the people I love do not live in my computer screen.

One of the guests makes some hilarious comments in his latest, “Down with Facebook.”  Definitely worth reading, although here are my favorite parts.

They then have access to each other’s web pages, and consequently to each other’s lives, quirks, photos, jottings, oversharings, and mental disorders, as well as to those of the ever-expanding universe of their friends’ circles, thus increasing the likelihood that you will either embarrass yourself or be embarrassed by someone whose life would never otherwise intersect with yours.

One by one, my non-joiner friends have succumbed. As one reluctantly joined the world of “poking” and getting “poked” by people he already talked to, people he had no interest in talking to, or people he didn’t know at all–all conducted under the suspect rubric of “friendship” so that they can look at each other’s photos and write dreary “status updates” on their “walls” (brief squibs about what you are doing at that exact moment, usually with emoticons and inappropriate quotation marks: “Matt Labash is wondering how long to marinate human flesh to get out that ‘gamey taste’ “)–he was almost apologetic about it. Within two days of his birth on Facebook, he said, “I have 198 friends. I have never heard of most of them. This is so dorky, I hate myself for doing it.” Being a true friend, I didn’t allay his guilt. I told him he was a very sad man, that collecting Facebook friends is the equivalent of being a catlady, collecting numerous Himalayans, which you have neither the time nor the inclination to feed. “You have obviously never been on Facebook,” he said. “It’s so much worse than collecting cats.”

Another longtime friend, the host of Fox’s Red Eye, Greg Gutfeld, tells me he has 3,200 Facebook friends: “I know maybe 50 of them.”

I missed the Palin drama.

Was it inappropriate for Levi to go on TV and discuss the intimate details of his estranged baby momma?  — Yes.

Was it inappropriate for him to neglect to tell the Palin family?  — Yes.

Was it innapropriate for a state Governor to go on record attacking the 19 year old Levi?  — YES.

Palin’s camp released the following statement,

“Bristol did not even know Levi was going on the show. We’re disappointed that Levi and his family, in a quest for fame, attention, and fortune, are engaging in flat-out lies, gross exaggeration, and even distortion of their relationship,”

Odd that if you take the second sentence and replace ‘Levi and his family’ with ‘Governor Palin’ and ‘their relationship’ with ‘her decisions as Governor’ it retains sense as it relates to her run for VP.

We’re disappointed that Governor Palin, in a quest for fame, attention, and fortune, is engaging in flat-out lies, gross exaggeration, and even distortion of her decisions as Governor.

Song a day Mann.

Have you heard about the song-a-day guy yet?  I love this guy.  He’s unemployed and to pass the time he started writing a song a day.  This is a great example of Generation Y’s creativity and ability to create media like it is second nature…probably because it is.  Between Twitter, Yelp, Facebook, You Tube, MySpace, blogs and everything else we use to create content my generation is creating exponentially more content than previous generations. This scares our parents and family members because they still worry about McCarthy-era big brothering.  This is going to be a ‘learn the hard way’ situation for most of us.  Although I recognize the dangers of broadcasting myself I refuse to let that scare me into completely censoring myself.  I hope that other Gen Y’rs do the same.  This guy is clearly, putting himself out there and most of his videos have a political edge.  Props Mann. 

I don’t know any of my friends.

Facebook is no longer enjoyable for me.  At its present, it’s just another calendar of events, another contact list, another photo album — another set of social responsibilities.  I honestly wish I wasn’t an early adopter of Facebook.  My college was one of the first few added and now I feel like I don’t even know half my friends — or more like 95% of them.  I hate status updates and even new pics because I’m unaware of my audience.  At least on ladyprogress.com I know that I don’t know who’s reading this.  On Facebook I should feel like I have some control over my friends but I don’t really know who they are anymore and it really irks me.

I think everyone will come to this point.  There needs to be some way that friends drop off into the netherworld.  Just like they do in real life.  The recent article in the NYT hits many of my feelings about the current Facebook.  I like separation between my groups.  It isn’t about hiding anything, it is about directing communication effectively.

Uniting disparate groups on a single Internet service runs counter to 50 years of research by sociologists into what is known as “homophily” — the tendency of individuals to associate only with like-minded people of similar age and ethnicity.

Mark my words, this is going to happen to everyone.  Connectivity is like a big circle.  Being connected to no one is the same as being connected to everyone.  There is a happy medium and once you exceed that, Facebook is more like ‘random people I met once’ book or ‘person I used to be friends with’ book.  Not really a group I want to keep in contact with.

Facebook thinks privacy factors are the solve all, well they are not.  I don’t want any of my ‘friends’ to know I’m censoring them.  So I don’t censor any one, I censor everyone.  To be a professional, it is a necessity.

Facebook is trying to teach members to use privacy settings to manage their network so they can speak discreetly only to certain friends, like co-workers or family members, as opposed to other “friends” like bosses or professional colleagues. But most Facebook users haven’t taken advantage of the privacy settings; the company estimates that only 20 percent of its members use them.

If you’re anti web communication, grow up or lose out.

If you were hoping that internet communication was just a phase, and that us crazy young people would realize that face-to-face communication is far superior and back track…think again.  The advent of the netbook is going to make sure we keep walking down the path of emails, IM’s and text communication.  Netbooks are as cheap as 50 bucks right now says the NYT.  This means that instead of typing a couple sentences on your phone when you’re away from your home base, you’ll be able to conduct full scale personal and professional communication — from anywhere.

AT&T announced on Tuesday that customers in Atlanta could get a type of compact PC called a netbook for just $50 if they signed up for an Internet service plan — an offer the phone company may introduce elsewhere after a test period. This year, at least one wireless phone company in the United States will probably offer netbooks free with paid data plans, copying similar programs in Japan, according to industry experts.

Another cool techy way to stay in touch is the new Verizon Hub.  This seems perfect for the family on the go.  The reviews are mixed but there is obvious potential.  This product looks ideal for a family on the go with a big family plan.  Nothing is as evolved as it should be for proper functionality so far but they are planning on adding a ton of other widgets and features.  Another big issue at present is that non-verizon users can not partake.  Supposedly all of these issues are on Verizon’s radar.  Check out a video of it here.   It appears as if the release was a bit premature.  But I think Verizon just wanted to put the idea in the mainstream arena so they could pretend to be leading the techy battle over AT&T right now.  But they aren’t quite there as PC Magazine reports.

The “Hub 2.0″ software looks so good, it’s frustrating that Verizon didn’t have a clear timeline for when it’s releasing it. They’re showing it off now mostly to prove that the Hub is a platform which can grow, and not a device with functionality set in stone, Naggar said.

Weed is the big issues even with 465,476 votes on 13,725 questions from 28,425 people.

Obama held an online forum today.  As if Leno, 60 minutes, his public press conference etc weren’t enough exposure already (I’m not complaining).  And these were the top questions from each category – taken from the Open for Questions forum at WhiteHouse.gov.  The most notable questions are from Financial Stability and Budget — both about marijuana legalization.  Hot topic right now.  A bill to legalize marijuana is coming up across state legislatures as well, like in Mass.  (Thanks for the heads up JS).

Some media outlets are saying that Norml pulled a fast one on the voting by rallying all their members.  Either way, the President brushed the question off with a grin and possibly some inner-monologue reminiscing.  His response was (USA Today),

“I don’t know what that says about the online audience,” the president says with chuckle.  “The answer is no, I don’t think that is a good strategy to grow our economy.”

You can watch the whole question session here.

Education:  “The Founding Fathers believed that there is no difference between a free society and an educated society. Our educational system, however, is woefully inadequate. How do you plan to restore education as a right and core cultural value in America?”

Home Ownership:  “President Obama: What benefits from the stimulus plan are there to those of us who are paying our mortgages, but living paycheck to paycheck?”

Health Care Reform:  “Why can we not have a universal health care system like many European countries, where people are treated based on needs, rather than financial resources?”

Veterans:  “The unemployment rate for Iraq and Afghanistan veterans is higher than the national unemployment rate. Our veterans are a national treasure. How can you, the VA and I ensure our veterans are successfully transitioning into civilian life?”

Small Business:  “what specifically can the federal govt do to lower the cost of providing quality health coverage for small business owners”

Auto Industry:  “What steps are being taken to ensure that the auto industry uses the bailout money it gets responsibly, so that we don’t end up in this same situation in a few years?”

Retirement Security:  “Will you require Congress to pay into social security like the rest of us?”

Green Jobs and Energy:  “”Will you consider decriminalizing the recreational/medical use of marijuana(hemp) so that the government can regulate it, tax it, put age limits on it, and create millions of new jobs and a multi-billion dollar industry right here in the U.S.?””

Financial Stability:  “Would you support the bill currently going through the California legislation to legalize and tax marijuana, boosting the economy and reducing drug cartel related violence?”

Jobs:  “What are your plans for the failing, “War on Drugs”, thats sucking money from tax payers and putting non-violent people in prison longer than the violent criminals?”

Budget:  “With over 1 out of 30 Americans controlled by the penal system, why not legalize, control, and tax marijuana to change the failed war on drugs into a money making, money saving boost to the economy? Do we really need that many victimless criminals?”

Were moustaches always this cool?

Guys love facial hair.  Most ladies do not.  But facial hair prevails all the same, especially lately.  In the last week alone I’ve read 5 or more articles about facial hair and its range of uses for marketing and publicity.  The themes range from its use to raise money for non-profits…

Whether waxed, curled, combed or crocheted, moustaches can be a way to impress or intimidate the people around you.  But growing facial hair can also be a way to raise money and awareness.  For 826 Boston — a nonprofit writing and tutoring program — they have taken advantage of the moustache craze to support their growing organization.

…to a bingo-esque game at a Harvard grad school, or the newly formed NYC Beard and Moustache Championships.

I bite.  Guys…what gives?  Why is growing facial hair that cool?  And if you think it is indeed that cool (or even if you don’t) , check out these sites.  American Mustache Institute, Moustache Me, Fake Moustache.

Guess who might be next in the moustache revolution?

Now we’re stripping 13 year old girls to see if they have 800mg Advil?

As detailed in a NYT article today, a 13-yr old girl (Savana Redding) was strip searched as an 8th grader after another 13-yr old girl accused her of having Rx strength Advil (ooooh…scary drug) hidden on her body.  The case has made it all the way up to the US Supreme Court.  One side incorrectly asserting that schools must take liberties to control drug use while the other uses common sense to see the error of school officials.  It is absolutely absurd to strip search a 13 yr-old in school without a parent or guardian present unless there is overwhelming evidence that the student has a bomb strapped to their chest.  Tthat is there are wires hanging our of their L.E.I. jeans!  As reported in the Times,

In Ms. Redding’s case, the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, in San Francisco, ruled that school officials had violated the Fourth Amendment’s ban on unreasonable searches. Writing for the majority, Judge Kim McLane Wardlaw said, “It does not require a constitutional scholar to conclude that a nude search of a 13-year-old child is an invasion of constitutional rights.”  “More than that,” Judge Wardlaw added, “it is a violation of any known principle of human dignity.”

I completely agree and if there is any time where privacy should be most respected, 13 is that time.  I can’t imagine how embarrassed and upset Savana must have been after being strip searched at her middle school!  Unfortunately, the school district doesn’t see their obvious boundary crossing behavior.

…the school district said, the search was “not excessively intrusive in light of Redding’s age and sex and the nature of her suspected infraction.”

Adam B. Wolf, a lawyer with the American Civil Liberties Union, which represents Ms. Redding, said her experience was “the worst nightmare for any parent.”

“When you send your child off to school every day, you expect them to be in math class or in the choir,” Mr. Wolf said. “You never imagine their being forced to strip naked and expose their genitalia and breasts to their school officials.”

This incident reminds me how far we have to go when it comes to teaching young women to love and nurture their bodies, that are their own.  This behavior teaches young women that their bodies are the property of others.  If you think I’m going to far then consider how you’d feel if you were strip searched at 13, 23 or even 33 for drugs that you knew you didn’t have on you.  Would that make you feel in control of your own body?

And if you doubt that we are losing the battle in proving to young women that they deserve respect at all times.  Read the recent article in the NYT detailing young women’s thoughts regarding Rihanna and Chris Brown…so sad .

AIG chieftain representin’ Che.

The fascination with Che in the US is hilarious.  I, along with many of my peers, own a silk screened Che shirt.  I feel a bit ashamed wearing it seeing as if I’m 99.9% pacifist and Che…well, was not.   But, I do consider myself a lover of many things ‘marxist’ and  ‘socialist’ and therefore wear the shirt as an unabashed criticism of capitalism.  So, that is my excuse.  What is the excuse of this AIG big-wig in charge of financial products?  I’m guessing he’s a pretty big fan of capitalism. 

Facebook feeling the twueeze.

Facebook recently changed their homepage.  Hmm…some features coincidentally resemble Twitter.  For instance, instead of asking for your ‘status message’ I am… they are asking “What’s on your mind?”

You can also direct a “What’s on your mind?” message to anyone…kind of like @.

If I was Facebook I’d be scared too.  They had a lock on the market for a while.  MySpace was lame, and LinkedIn was professional.  Plus no one really respected friendster or any of the other borderline sites.  But now we are being inundated with online social networking.  Too much if you ask me.  Even if you don’t ever play Second Life, you might as well be.

Fun social networking stats

Thanks Adam Ostrow, interesting stuff.

In 2008, users spent 63% more time on member communities than they did in the previous year. However, within member communities, Facebook saw growth of 566% in time spent on it by users worldwide. As has been reported elsewhere, Facebook’s fastest growth demographic is older users – the social network tacked on 12.4 million people between ages 35-49 in 2008 according to Nielsen.

Some other key findings from the report:

- Globally, Facebook reaches 29.9% of global Internet users, versus 22.4% for MySpace.

- MySpace remains the most profitable social network, generating an estimated $1 billion in revenue versus $300 million for Facebook in 2008.

- Facebook is the top social network in all countries except Germany, Brazil, and Japan (Nielsen still has MySpace as tops in US in the report, but as of January ’09, that had changed).

- On Twitter, CNN, The New York Times, and BBC have the greatest reach among mainstream media companies as of late February.

Twitter as a search engine

Twitter Bird

As a new generation learns about Twitter it is important to think of Twitter as having a fluid definition.  Gen Y is super aware of the concept of a sexual identity spectrum, well Twitter also has an identity spectrum.  This is what I usually hear from people who don’t “get” Twitter.

‘Why do I care?  Ok, you’re having dinner now.  You’re stuck in traffic now. Boring.’

I understand the sentiment and I think it is kind of lame when my friends Tweet their every moment’s emotion and location.  But, after that stuck in traffic you might find a link to a modern interpretation of Descarte, or a new social media marketing platform idea.  Twitter is everything and nothing.  By choosing who you ‘follow’ you are deciding what kind of content you receive.   Choose just friends and be prepared for a lot of mundane comments.  Choose companies and be blasted by their propaganda…but choose a blogger who has something to say and you’ve got a lot of new original content coming your way.  I’m obviously partial to bloggers, but Twitter is used best when it is eveyrone’s personal search engine.  

I’m not the first to notice this.  Michael Arrington makes some great points,

 

At a dinner tonight with a friend the conversation turned toTwitter. He just didn’t get it, and he’s certainly not the first person to tell me that. Specifically, my friend didn’t understand the massive valuation ($250 million or more) that Twitter won in its recent funding. I told him why I thought it was more than justified: Twitter is, more than anything, a search engine.

I told him what I thought of Twitter as a micro-blogging service: it’s a collection of emotional grunts. But it’s wonderful nonetheless. And enough people are hooked on it that Twitter has reached critical mass. If something big is going on in the world, you can get information about it from Twitter.

Twitter also gathers other information, like people’s experiences with products and services as they interact with them.

Meghan McCain “I consider myself a progressive Republican”

After watching Meghan McCain on the campaign trail I never thought I would agree with a lot she has to say in her blog for the Daily Beast.  But she really does seem like a progressive Republican (which I previously thought to be a oxymoron).  Plus she is a great voice for the conservative youth which has a new agenda, different than their older counterparts.  Meghan talks about how this new progressive Republican ideology differs.

I am sure most extreme conservatives and extreme liberals would find me a confusing, walking contradiction. But I assure you, there are many people out there just like me who represent a new, younger generation of Republicans.

I’m often criticized for not being a “real” Republican, and I have been called a RINO—Republican In Name Only—in the past. Many say I am not “conservative enough,” which is something that I am proud of. It is no secret that I disagree with many of the old-school Republican ways of thinking. One of the biggest issues from which I seem to drift from the party base is in my support of gay marriage. I am often criticized for previously voting for John Kerry and my support of stem-cell research. For the record, I am also extremely pro-military and a big supporter of the surge and the Iraq war.

I also love that she is talking smack about Ann Coulter.  Now I believe in Meghan’s semi-sanity ever more!

To make matters worse, certain individuals continue to perpetuate negative stereotypes about Republicans. Especially Republican women. Who do I feel is the biggest culprit? Ann Coulter. I straight up don’t understand this woman or her popularity. I find her offensive, radical, insulting, and confusing all at the same time.

I  did however find many of Meghan’s musings rather sophomoric, sorry Meg.  Especially her views on dating people of the opposite party — something I’m pretty adamant about and something that she thinks is just plain stupid.  I’m adamant about it because I pay attention to the party line of the RNC and the DNC.  I don’t agree with everything the DNC says, but I am unable to think anything the RNC says makes sense or is ethical.  How can you like someone who you don’t think is ethical?

The election killed my personal life.  OK, maybe killed is a bit of an exaggeration. But it does seem to be on life support. Of all the things people warned would happen post-election, no one ever said anything about how complicated dating would become. Especially if your dad loses the election. There are things that have been difficult, but nothing quite as tough as dating. I fear the election has destroyed my ability and desire to date. Now, I cannot say at any point in my life that I have been very good at dating. But I have become something I used to despise: people who let politics dictate his or her attraction to someone.

I am a person that has always prided myself on keeping politics out of my relationships. I think I would have probably graduated from Columbia friendless had I made politics a focal point in any of my friendships during college. I have many friends who openly voted for Barack Obama (many of them also didn’t). Who my friends voted for is of no concern to me. I am adult enough to understand that people vote for their own personal reasons, and I know how personal politics can be to someone.

Of course politics are personal, so personal that they should play a big role in your choosing of friends and mates.

With a special guest appearance by…

The LiLos and Paris’ of our generation have some pull.  In fact, they can easily pack a club just by putting their name on the flyer.  But Mr. Belding?  Seriously?  If you are a Gen Y’r you know you were a Saved by the Bell fan, but I wouldn’t even go see Slater (Mario Lopez).  Who would ever want to go see Mr. Belding grinding with some 20somethings?  Yech…the picture alone makes me never want to go to McFadden’s again.

Public art, does it have to represent the city or the artist?

I found it amusing last week when I visited Chicago, excited to see Cloud Gate after going to Anish Kapoor’s incredible exhibit at the Boston ICA, to find that most Chicagoans don’t even know that their massive piece of public art in Millennium park is called Cloud Gate.  They all just call it ‘the bean.’  Nor did they know that it was made by the world-renowned sculpture Anish Kapoor.  I guess it isn’t really surprising that no one knew the name — I’ve been in Boston for years and always thought the Zakim bridge was called the Tobin bridge and have no idea who designed it.  That surprise along with the current debate surrounding “Blue Mustang,” a new piece of public art outside the Denver Airport, spurs me to question public art and its purpose.

A local Denver resident fanned the fires of this hot new debate as she created an internet forum for comments, or more accurately haikus.  Want to know what I’m talking about?  Here is an excerpt from the NYT article.

“It’s definitely achieved its purpose of being memorable,” said Rachel Hultin, a real-estate broker in Denver who started a page on Facebook last month to vent her horse anxieties, byebyebluemustang.com, and found herself at the center of the debate.

Ms. Hultin, who said she started the campaign partly on a whim, “after a few drinks with friends,” also suggested on her page that people post comments in haiku form. Denver residents and travelers who had formed an opinion about the statue while passing through, leapt at the challenge. To wit:

Anxiously I fly
apocalyptic hell beast
fails to soothe my nerves.

Local artists and city public art administrators say “Blue Mustang” has stirred a deeper debate too, about Denver itself, and what sort of image it wants to communicate. Is “Blue Mustang” an echo of the city’s high-plains bronco-busting past? Or a mocking denunciation of the Old West conventions? Or is it just strange?

This leads me to ask, should public art ever stir debate or should it always try to reflect the status quo and only egg on ‘oohs’ and ‘aws’?  I believe there is something really uniting and magical about public art that we could better harness.  We all look at it, and almost all of us appreciate it, regardless of our political or social affiliations.  We could use it as a gathering point literally and figuratively.  But, if it is deemed offensive by over half a city or state’s population should it be taken down?  What about 1/3?  Who decides what should go up and how much it is worth to the community?

Ms. Hultin, who started most of the fiery comments has since changed her mind and I think we can learn a lot about her evolved point of view.  Regardless of why it has been put up, we (the public) should use public art as a common way to connect about larger issues.  As Ms. Hultin insinuates for that in the last paragraph, we should use controversies that involve our entire community as a jumping off point to further understand each other.

Ms. Hultin, meanwhile, who got the ball rolling with her antihorse Facebook page, has changed her mind. She no longer wants “Blue Mustang” removed, as she once did. (City policy holds that public art pieces are left in place for five years, anyway, and officials have given no sign of budging.)

She now thinks that pamphlets at the airport, and maybe education courses for airport bus drivers, could lead viewers into a deeper understanding of the horse and the artist, she said, notwithstanding that she had been called “every name in the book” by defenders of the statue.

“In the process of being personally attacked through e-mail, and through learning more about the piece, I’ve shifted gears from, ‘I don’t think it’s appropriate,’ to ‘Let’s try and understand it,’ ” she said.